PARENTAL DECEPTION

PARENTAL DECEPTION

According to Child Psychology, “a child’s personality is usually formed; that is, has built the basis of what he/she will be in the future between age zero (0) to age six (6)”. After which he/she starts conforming to the external factors surrounding him/her in-line with the basic foundation he/she has formed. But many parents and adults do not know this, while few who know are not really conscious of it.
 

Many grownups think that children between this age range are too tender to know anything in life. So they keep isolating them in some basic training of life thereby depriving them from building a solid character structure that can sustain them in their everyday conformity to life at large.

“Children are heritage of the LORD and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that have his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate”, Psalms 127:3-5. The above stated scripture shows that children are supposed to be agents of happiness to both their families and the society at large, but today the reverse has become the case in many homes and communities.

We have seen many once happy children grow up to becoming nuisance in the society due to lack of cooperate, coordinated and basic home training. That is why the training of a child cannot be overemphasized. Both the secular training of the Educational System, the spiritual training of the Church System and the domestic training of the Home System are all very vital in the character formation and life of a child in the society.

So do your child and yourself a favor today, be the example of who your child should be from the home, rebuke the child without sentiments whenever it is a necessity. Encourage your child to get involved in spiritual training/exercises in the church. Then give the school all your support to carry out all the necessary disciplinary, secular / social training to make your child the man/ woman of honor for tomorrow.

We have seen parent come to school to fight because of their children, we have seen parent quarrel / fight with other parent because their children had misunderstanding among themselves, which after that moment the same children who just fought and quarreled will make up almost immediately, while their parents will be in perpetual enmity, this is folly; gross calculated deception on insensitive parents. We have also seen parent quarrel /fight in the church because their children were corrected or disciplined, what a pitiable parenting life style. All these attitudes are factors militating against the proper training of our today’s child.

Although the bible encourages disciplining a child which is a vital part of a child’s training, still we need to know and understand the measure of discipline required for a particular age of a child. Many grownups bully and perpetrates wickedness towards children all in the name of trying to discipline a child, this also can cause psychological damage to the personality of a child. So we encourage both the parents and teachers of our children, to make full participation towards the training of their children in LOVE. 

Whenever your child has been handled the way you do not like either in the school, in the church or within your neighborhood, instead of going to quarrel/ fight for them, please go to the authority of the school / church and report your case and allow them handle it. If it is within your neighborhood, approach your fellow adult who was involved, with a heart of inquiry not with an intention to defend, quarrel/ fight. Fighting a fellow adult because of a child in the presence of the child destroys the child faster than you want to rescue him/her. That child will lose respect for those older than him/her and may forever miss out in the training that, that correction given to him might have done in his future. Parent have to be wise in the training of a child, because we have a serious role to play in who they will become in the future.

On this note, it is important to list out five (5) important values every parent and teachers should endeavor to teach their children before they leave the primary stage of their educational life. It has been observed that these values are very effective when they are taught before age five (5). 

1.     Honesty _ Help children find a way to tell the truth always.

2.     Justice _ Insist that children make amends when they are at fault. Make them go beyond just apologizing, let them show a gesture of apology.

3.     Determination _ Encourage them to take up a challenge

4.     Consideration _ Teach them to think about others’ feelings

5.     Love _ Be generous with your affection towards them, because since children are naturally loving and generous with their affection they need it to be reciprocated. In addition to these values every child should also learn the Five (5) Magic Words, which are; Please, Excuse Me, Sorry, Thank You and Pardon Me.  

This is why we the church authority have established  Schools to enable us give our children a complete training that will lead them to fulfillment in life. Join us as we contribute to developing the society and our country by developing our children today.

Shalom! 

Pastor John Ebubechukwu Nweke